I place myself in situations daily that leave me trying to figure out the best direction to go, the correct way to handle things, the move that will benefit everyone. Not just my feelings or theirs but, both. As a manager and promoter I am sometimes left with the grueling task of being too honest or too comforting. Everyday I am faced with a decision that puts me in the drivers seat to choose right or wrong. I must make decisions in a split second or a deal could be lost. I must immediately come up with a suggestion or solution. I have to cover for people, I have to make excuses, I have to make the right choice for 60 different executives in one sentence, all for just one client.
On a recent flight from California, I was approached on a plane by a client. This client hammered me to the point that I wondered if I were to jump from the plane would it hurt worse. I found myself changing colors to accommodate my situation. I found myself agreeing with this clients gripse. He was complaining about one of my biggest employers and the largest entertainment conglomerate in the known world. When we arrived at the airport, he immediately was greeted with fans, photographers and local television stations. I on the other hand was greeted with a knot in my stomach. I couldn't believe that after all these years in the music industry, I allowed one person's gripes to change my colors.
I immediately started blaming it on my stress, no sleep, the changes in my prescriptions. Could it be I was just leaving Los Angeles, a world of "yes" people, dreamers and vultures. Or could it be I am just human too. I have witnessed many times the attacks people take on others, the pain it causes, the hurt and betrayal. I started down the escalator to grab my bags and decided to turn around.
I pressed through the crowd of fans and took this man by the arm. I whispered in his ear, "I dont agree with you. I think you are whining. I think you have been given too much and you are lazy and ungrateful. And, I love you, BUT it's not my job to cover up your lack of integrity and professionalism anymore."
I turned to leave and he asked me to wait. He stepped over and began his attack on me. I sat and listened while he vented. Then I realized, I was letting it go to the next level. I was allowing my honesty to be questioned. I was allowing myself to be punished for saying what I truly felt and thought. I told him I was excited about being apart of his life. But, I had to leave. I had to get my two faces to the car. I prayed for the Lord to direct me and keep me from falling into the "Yes man" trap again, to place a hedge of protection around me as I faced the industry's cancerous gossip mill. I was glad I went back to approach the artist to put my dignity and integrity to rest. But, it didn't stop me from feeling horrible about the many times I have changed colors to save someone's feelings, to vent my frustrations about someone or to agree with someone to get them to go away.
I know this seems little or small. But, if you think about it, saving someone's feelings, in this business, can be very costly. Telling someone they can sing to get them to spend money with you, only hurts them when radio denies them airplay. Telling an artist you understand their dilemma, when you actually think they are being ungrateful and overbearing to their record company is wrong. Not disagreeing with a story or rumor in this world is agreeing. And in gospel music not disagreeing relates to even more rumors as people use the "Rick Hendrix just told me..." in their next call.
I try to be the person I would like to meet today. The person that makes me feel better about myself. Someone I can go to and they will shoot straight and be honest. No matter the season, the amount of stress we're under, medications we're on, disappointments we face, it's still our job to be real, to be honest and faithful to our calling.
We all changes colors at times, the question is, when you do is there any conviction? Do you feel guilty? Do you want to make it right? If so, your heart's in the right place. Your life is in the right place. Your spirit's in the right place. Let God truly be a light when you speak. If you gossip-even to friends, let it go. If you agree with others to keep them happy, let it go. If they don't stay due to your honesty, it was a relationship for their egos. If you find yourself unhappy and dreading the next encounter with a friend, client or associate-let it go. If you cant get away from a friend or client due to work or family, then clean it up. Set boundaries for yourself. Don't let it own you. Allow yourself ways to get out of the gossip, the lies, or inappropriate jokes or conversations. Its easier to do right, than to go back and clean up wrong. TRUST me I know.
Rick Hendrix
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http://www.rickhendirx.com
Author: RickBHendrix
| Author's Website: http://www.rickhendrix.com
Written: 10/01/2006
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Category: Leave No Stone Unturned
Comments: 8
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I totally agree with you. In a world of fake people it is sometimes hard to be real. Even though it doesn't make it right ,I am sometimes not surprised by the actions of the "Hollywood crowd." It makes it even worse when you discover that some so-called Christians are not genuine. Being a minister's daughter, I have seen so much hypocrisy in the ministry and Christianity. I let myself get dissilutioned to the point that I wanted nothing to do with church. I am certainly not perfect and I have made more than my fair share of mistakes. I have not always made my parents proud or been the "real" person they brought me up to be. I finally had to rely on the morals and values with which my wonderful parents raised me. I guess it's because I had such a great home life that I get so disgusted with people that aren't real. That is one of the main things that my parents instilled into my brother and myself. What a great article! God Bless You!
This is an excellent message.
If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit
- Galatians 5:25.
Rick Hendrix, I will never forget that you told me one time that the song that we were wanting to release was just not very good. This was many years ago and I look back now and apprecaite your honesty. You were right. I had money to pay you and you refused me. That speaks highly for you, to me. Over the past few years you have treated me more than just a client, but as a friend and that is with great honesty! Thank you! You are setting a good exzample in many areas for people in ministry. THANK YOU! By the way, I am glad that you didn't jump from the plane (lol)
Oh thats awesome-Johnathan. But, I cant imagine you with a song that isnt great.Great article Rick. Its good to see honesty and realness in a man.
WOW- great article.
Rick, thanks for showing your humanity and your struggle to make right choices. It is difficult this day in time to maintain relationships, work or personal, because it takes time. Honesty is a vertue but it's not always welcomed. I too find myself walking away from a conversation angry with myself for not saying what I think and how I feel. You have to be nice, my pastor husband says. I pray daily that God will help me to speak honestly, yet in love, but I still haven't mastered the art of tact yet.
And I am so disgusted with SGM artists that are fake until I could scream. From the foyer to the platform/stage shines a whole new light. And after the most recent encounter we had with a group this last weekend, it will be just that, the last that we will have a 'well known' SGM artists at our church. No wonder other churches won't host SGM artist in our area. I'm sure they have had similar experiences.
My prayer is that I work harder to be more real, genuine and sincere in my walk with Christ.
Donna H.
If the client you speak of was "greeted [at the airport] with fans, photographers and local television stations," then he was obviously NOT an SG artist. LOL.
It speaks well for you, Rick, that you're not willing to just lie to people and take their money to promote a song that's not very good. Taking stances like that is the only way we're gonna make SG better. As it is, it seems like any church trio
who has enough money to record their own CDs can get "signed" even if the talent is not there.
Personally, as I keep writing songs and keep using the lo-fi technology available to me (with my meager income) to record these songs, I wonder, "Why am I doing this? Why am I so bent on opening myself up to failure and rejection in a genre of music in which I could probably never earn a living?"
But then I write a NEW song, then I get all happy and I want to share it with people...
Chris J. Becker
Cedar Rapids, IA
Rick, have you tried a garlic necklace to ward off the vampires? You show us a side of SGM and maybe stardom none of us should ever hope to see. Back blood-suckers. Back. + + + + I hope you rat out the next clod that goes for your throat so we can take care of him/her for you.
Tony Partigianoni
http://www.ksgm.com/images/gospel.gif
Pure SGM & Quartet-Style Singing
http://www.ksgm.com
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